Distraught!!!!

Bloggers block….what to write about???

Actually, I have tons & tons of stuff to write about but due to time constraint & being a bit of a lazy ass, I’ll always tell myself I’ll do it tomorrow. Tomorrow turns out to be months….

Anyways, I’ve noticed that I only blog when I’m upset & I’m pretty upset today.

Tell me if I’m over reacting by this….

Don’t you get upset if your friend knows something about you that no one else was supposed to know yet & instead of warning/telling you about it, she ask someone else to tell you instead for reasons nobody knows why? (my guess is she doesn’t have the balls to tell me personally). Point being, instead of you knowing that particular information first hand from the person who found out about the news, you get to know it from a 3^rd party. Now, isn’t the information supposed to be sensitive at the first place?

I don’t know why it bothers me so much but I do feel that if she thinks that particular information is important for me to know, why can’t she tell me personally? It's not like I live deep in the jungle that she can't reach me. I mean she called the other person didn't she?

It makes me feel like she pity me & she’s afraid that I might breakdown & so she needs another person to break the news to me (& that is suppose to make me feel much better about the whole thing).

Maybe I am over reacting, maybe not..

I HATE BEING SETUP ON A BLIND DATE!!

Especially if I have NO CLUE about it. What is it about married friends who seem to think that they are doing us a BIG FAVOUR by setting us up with the next 'jantan' that seem to be available. Forget the fact that neither of us have anything in common or if the so call person (i.e. ME) wanted to be set up at the first place. And to make things worst, these friends of mine keep saying stuff like...

BET YOU GUYS WILL GET MARRIED NEXT YEAR (first meeting & already about marriage, it's just plain embarrassingly, especially to me ) or

SHE'S A GOOD COOK SO YOU ARE SO LUCKY (eh??? do you have to tell a complete stranger that, so he'll know how marketable I am)


PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT MATCH MAKE ME and think you are doing me a favour. I have nothing against it but make sure when you guys want to do so, be sure THAT GUY can at least SPEAK instead of staring at my face or hair or what ever he was staring at. It's just plain rude. You guys know me long enough to know what type of men interest me. Don't insult me by assuming that any guy is good enough. I don't mean to be a snob but I had my heart broken once , so don't think just because he has a dick he's good enough. So please stop doing me a favour because you're not. And MIND YOUR OWN BLOODY BUSINESS!!!!

Latest UPDATE: I was just being told that THAT FUCKER thinks that I wouldn't make a good mother cos I have tattoo. GO FIGURE!!!

SOB!!

Why do men tend to think women who go clubbing are cheap sluts? Seriously!! Just because we drink & dance our ass off does not mean we're easy. In fact, we are far from easy cos I think those women that think they're too good to do all things they deem 'cheap' are much much easier then us.

Last Friday, my friend & I decided to hit the clubs as it's been a while since we had our ladies night together. So there we were, drinking our long island teas & flirting with this cute hunk when this good for nothing guy came to our place & had the nerve to grope my ass. Serious shit...he didn't even have the decency to say hi. Just GROPE it like it's his to begin with. Now you might think it could be an accident, but trust me when I say, I know how accident feels like. That was definitely groping. Anyways, I was too high at the time to care so I just grab my friend & decided to hit the dance floor & guess who followed us??!! The stupid perverted asshole!!! He strategically station himself behind me & (yup, you guess it) grope my ass again.

Now I was beginning to think perhaps there's a sign on my back that says, 'Grope My Ass' cos it can't be of all the assess there was at the club that night, my ass seem to be the one he's obsessing about. So I turn to him, gave him the biggest smile a woozy women could give & told him use his hands instead to shove his short dick up his own damn ass & go fuck himself!! (I think I said that loud enough that people standing around us can actually hear). Stupid guy didn't even wait for me to finish ........he just left, perhaps to find another ass to drool after.

Where do these guys came from??? Has it been that long since I've been out there that there's this new breed of guys that just do it, ask questions later. Groping ass is suppose to make me interested in you for some reason?! Is it a secret code I'm suppose to know?

'Ooooo.....that was nice of you to grope my ass. I'm interested in you too. Now can I grab your dick so that I can figure out your size then perhaps if I think your size is perfect, you can buy me a drink?'

The nerve of some fuck idiot!!!

The Ultimate Thing to Ponder...

Why is money never enough?

I found myself broke ( yet again...) & it's only the middle of the month. The funny thing is I didn't even buy anything. It's just gone. I couldn't be spending it all on food cos I don't think I ate that much. Haven't bought anything for myself for the longest time, haven't been out clubbing or socializing, in fact have not been doing anything but sit on my ass the whole month & still the money just dissappear. It's like there's a hole in my purse.

I was probably richer when I was a student living on the allowances my dad gave me. Hack, I could even afford to sneak out of college & go out 3-4 nights a week back then. How I managed to do that, I don't now.

Truth be told, no matter how much one earn, it would never be enough. There's always something to buy, spend on, to pay....but why is it, when we earned much less back when we first started working, when we pay the same bills, buy the same things etc...as now, we are back to square one? Where did all that extra pay go? We ( by we, I meant ME) , always tell ourselves, a hundred extra would make so much different but would it really make a different?

Maybe at the back of my mind, I'm just getting feedup of not being able to enjoy my hard earning income (cewahhh....) but hey, maybe that's a sign of being an adult & taking a quote from Grey's Anatomy;

"We're adults!! When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?"

A Piece of Mind

It's been a while.....business as usual, social life none existent ....:(

My brain has been working overtime.

Have been waking up super super early (at 5.30am no less) for the past 4 weeks. Had to do in order to beat the traffic. Felt like I was going back to school. New job has been taking over my life. BFF is pestering me with her wedding plan arrangement. Mum & I have not been in good terms this past few weeks.

March comes & goes. It's April & I'm turning 30 this month. Yup, the BIG 30!!!**sigh** Time flies when you're having fun (or not). What saddened me the most is (I know this is gonna sound silly)...I missed having to celebrate my B-day with my ex BF....

I guess I just miss HIM, period. I mean it has been a while & I think I'm ready to move on but my heart just got burned really bad that any attempt to give it another try died down pretty quickly before you could even say B-O-Y-E-E-F-R-E-N. I hate feeling this way & I know I should just be happy that I didn't get married for the wrong reason. For all I know if I were to get married 2 years ago to HIM, I would probably be a mother of one with ISSUES. And thinking back of the said issues does make me wander why I love HIM so much...* sigh* guess it's just one of those mysteries in life. But I do miss HIM a lot (still do... ) & I still love HIM but I also hate HIM all at the same time,.... it's pretty confusing at times & it just drives me nuts!!. He was after all the love of my life. And I know that when you break up with your BF & if you do still love him, you're supposed to wish him the best in life & hope that he's happy doing whatever that he's doing, well .............I for once would like to wish that...

HE'S FUCKING MISERABLE FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE & IF HE DOES GET MARRIED, I HOPE HE HAS A BAD ONE!!!!!!!

I am not ready to make nice....!!!

Arghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

I wake up with hatred tis morning for my best friend. & I dont simply hate ppl for no reason, but dont u just have one of those days when u just want to push ur BFF down a cliff or in front of a bus cos they're acting like asshole sometimes. My BFF u see is tis nice mother of two. Now she's a gem & all but she has this habit of making other ppl doing things her way. Good skill to have in life but when u decided to use it on ur BFF (& i dont mean just this one time) ur just pushing it sista. Patience has it's limit!!

So tis former BFF (at least for the time being) forgot her precious coat in my car last nite & she had to fly to KL tis early morning for a meeting. as not to jinx the out come of the meeting (tis is beginning to sound silly)... she insisted that i have to send THAT stupid coat to her on my way to work at 6.30am which means i have to reschedule my sleeping pattern for her which means i would have to wake up super super early & beat the morning traffic just so i wouldnt be late to work. being a nice (ahemmm) person that i am, i said i'll try but NOooooo........she said I MUST(& almost make it sound like it's between life & death). now my drive to my office takes me an hour & the airport(where she wanted me to send it) is the opposite direction. there is no way in hell i would do that & i have zero patient when it comes to traffic jam. My mum, being sympathetic decided to volunteer, no questions ask. & how did my friend react to that?

'But can't it be u instead, then probably we cld have breakfast while we wait for me to check in at 8?'

HElllloooo...what part of I don't wanna be late for work dont u understand? u think i work for my father & just comes to work at any time of the day. just becos i work for the government doesnt mean it's ok to be late. i mean really, that's just pushing it. My mum who has nothing to do with ur stupid ugly coat problem volunteer to send it to u and had to miss her rerun of Mcloud's Daughter at 8 (she never ever misses that). I've had enough of ur insensitivity & I hate u to death right this moment.

Now, tomorrow i might love u again....Perhaps